That DAY just passed again

I hate Valentines Day - and its not because I had a crappy day or have had several crappy Valentine's Days.  

It always signifies the beginning of a miscarriage.  I was feeling crappy on Valentine's day evening and just took it easy while GJA was at his band class.  We were going to go out for Valentine's supper on Feb 15 because he couldn't miss his rehearsal.  I felt like there was something up, but didn't know what.  I had a horrible dream that night about the baby and felt crappy all day at work on Feb 15.  While we were having supper, I was having contractions, but didn't really know that's what it was until we were in the ER later that night.   

So, if that baby had survived, he/she would be turning 7 in September.  Just on Feb 13, PJ kept talking about his sister...and I know its silly, but I wonder if he saw her spirit.  I asked him what the sister's name was...he said he didn't know but that it was a baby. They say that children often are more in-tune with that kind of stuff and I've heard that kids with autism may be more in-tune with it too.  So...never say never, I guess.

Anyway, I'm thinking of this wee angel baby.